Patrolus Interruptus 

Boring.

That’s how this night started, and that’s how it’s gonna end. No vampires, no demons. No zombies, which, when you think about it, is actually a good thing. I roll my shoulders a few times, trying to stay loose.

Sighing, I decide to pack it in. Grab my awesomely stylish new black backpack, and stuff Mr. Pointy back in. Jump over the few headstones on my way to the cemetery gates, and suddenly my joy is totally destroyed.

A screeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaam! splits the midnight air to my left.

All instinct now, I drop my bag, having grabbed up my stake again, and race toward the shrill noise.

Sprinting around a small mausoleum, I menace the horrible, noxious, vile… Xander that is flapping at Cordelia to “shut up, Cordy! It was just a rat.”

Sighing again for the second time in as many minutes, I tell the couple, “my kingdom for a monster.”

my kingdom for a monster

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